The following was written by Dr. Robert Cummings and presented to Dr. Harry D. Thiers upon his retirement from San Francisco State University in January 1989. ________________________________________________ To: Prof. Harry D. Thiers, Ph.D. (Doctor of Phungus), MD (Mycelia Dementia), DDS (Describe it, Dry it, Stash it), RN (RetiriN’), and PS (Pass the Sherry). [Known to his gang of mold-bashing ruffians as "Two Gun Thiers" for his wild-west affectation of bagging mushrooms from horseback with a Smith and Wesson. Scourge of innocent botany students, especially violent when asked "Do we have to know this?" Darling of the Infectious Molds Club and Director of F.U.N.G.U.S. (Friends for Uncovering Nasties Growing Under Soil), a deep-cover arm of the CIA, where it is said he engineered a diabolical plan to implant computer chips into truffles, thereby producing a pate that could place chess. Reputed to be the Baddest and Ugliest Duff-Buster west of Winnemucca; Single-handedly responsible for Designer Spore Prints, the mind-altering ‘Melzer’s & Seltzer’ cocktail, the Great Stinkhorn Caper of ‘65, and introducing the term ‘Butt Rot’ onto San Francisco State campus. His motto: "Dedicated to Decay."] From: Bob Cummings: Botanist Extraordinaire, best known for his speckly green eyes and delightful personality, who but for poor timing and worse luck would have been a student of ol’ Two Gun himself. Re: "Reporting a New Mushroom Genus and Species in North America." Pseudothiersia incomparabilis R. Cummings Etymology: Named in honor of Professor Harry D. Thiers, upon his retirement, and coincidentally, for bearing a striking resemblance to him. Basidiocarp large and showy, easily visible against oak and pine duff, or even in tall grass. The entire fruit body eccentric and threatening to become prostrate to resupinate upon retirement. Pileus glabrous on top, ringed with delicate, receding hairs, or covered with a volval patch in wet weather; cuticle hirsute to fibrillose, especially when found in woods on weekends; pileus very thick and very hard at maturity, but even then retaining a soft context. Gills often green in the morning, soon becoming pallid, finally assuming rosy to vinaceous tones after 5 or 6 pm, i.e., reviving when moistened. Stipe ventricose, often stuffed, quickly expanding to a ventral bulge, belted below, then tapering rapidly to the base, shaggy, variously patterned in checks, stripes, or spots. Skirt lacking (but present in a nearby individual). Spores not breeding true, but giving rise to leafy liverworts, these capable of forming symbiotic relationships with compatible fungi to reestablish the dikaryon. Odor variable, depending on length of field trip, from Old Spice to Old Socks. Texture and Taste tough and disagreeable. Habitat: widely distributed in laboratories, classrooms, herbaria, and pickup trucks, otherwise found in forests, fields and on roadsides from the first rains until mid-summer; rarely seen in small aircraft. Usually occurring amidst troops of immature Thiersiopsis immitans; the nature of this relationship appears to be symbiotic and obligate.